This Bob Jones University merchandise just made my life complete

In what is likely the irony of the decade, Bob Jones University obviously outsourced their athletic merchandising to an outside vendor. The result was this.

Is it possible to do both at one time? If so, I’m impressed.

It’s apparently no longer able to be ordered, supposedly by BJU demand, which just makes it funnier.

Seriously, someone could open a Coke bottle with that opener.

Maybe it’s God’s way of telling them their theology in this regard is stupid by turning the teetotalers into unwitting dispensers of adult beverage accessories. Just a thought.


Controversial modesty post confirms pride comes before modesty

The Christian blogosphere was recently set on fire last week when someone dared to call out yoga pants as something Christian females probably shouldn’t wear. Things got so nasty that she closed down her comments section.

Really? You’re going to get that offended that someone says you dress inappropriately that you’ll fight tooth and nail over some pants?

Well, yeah. These pants are really hot on me.

I won’t even go into calling out specific articles of clothing, but you Christian females often have some jacked up priorities.

This is the list of what many of you ask when you get dressed.

  1. Does this look good on me?
This is the list of what you should ask yourself when you get dressed.
  1. Is this modest?
  2. Does this look good on me?
If the answer is no on the first, the second question shouldn’t need to be asked.

Over-the-top "patriotism" in sports reached its sad, logical conclusion

The University of Texas marching band, amid all the quasi-staged-patriotism that invades November as part of Veterans Month Day, pulled this over the weekend.

They probably don’t even know what battle this is from.

I shouldn’t have to say anything other than this: This is bullshit.

Seriously, this is the apex of the one upmanship that goes into showing how much a team loves ‘MERICA. How much camo/stars/stripes/inspirational words/dead Presidents can we put on things?

It helps recruiting and it sells merchandise, so it’s really more about the dead Presidents than anything.

I wonder how long it took for Evolution to figure out this one

I don’t care if you’re a day-age creationist, literal 24-hour creationist or something in between. We can all agree that this is pretty funny.

Let me just say this. Evolutionists say they have it all figured out, but we’re still discovering new parts of the human body.

You mean I have to redraw this? It took me all day.

Don’t believe me? Read this. We’ve discovered a “new” layer of the cornea and a “new” knee ligament, all within the last several months.

So, for clarity, they can tell us exactly what happened millions of years ago in a place billions of light years away, but they still don’t know what makes up the sack of chemicals known as the human body.

Seems legit.

A poorly written post on tattoos and Christian liberty

I recently had a conversation with a friend who is considering getting her first tattoo, a Christian-themed one at that. There’s just one caveat – she still lives with her parents and they’re generally opposed to the idea.

Seriously, who doesn’t want Rose telling us about St. Olaf while embedded in their skin?

The argument that many Christians use against the likes of tattoos or extra piercings pretty much goes like this, assuming they don’t point back to the Old Law, which isn’t even in effect anymore.

“You could cause your brother to stumble.”

And that’s pretty much it.

But that verse is massively taken out of context. In fact, the entire reasoning behind it is pure BS.

In fact, Romans 14 is not supposed to be an excuse to a Christian being a judgmental asshole. Paul actually tells the weaker and stronger Christians to not judge each other for their Christian liberty.

“Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.” – Romans 14:4

What’s more pertinent here is the very end of the chapter.

“Do not, for the sake of food, destroy the work of God. Everything is indeed clean, but it is wrong for anyone to make another stumble by what he eats. It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble. The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who has no reason to pass judgment on himself for what he approves. But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.” – Romans 14:20-23

Somehow, people take that to mean that we shouldn’t drink or get tattoos or anything that may be socially taboo. If that were the case, then we shouldn’t have a TV or a pet dog or play electric guitars, because some people think they’re evil and will pass judgment.

In his book God Gave Wine, Kenneth Gentry makes this argument on what this chapter is actually about while addressing alcohol consumption, but this also applies to tattoos, piercings, etc. Emphasis is added by me.

“Simply put, Paul is here warning about the outcome of enticing the weaker brother into sinning against his conscience – which will bring God’s judgment. Although no true believer can lose his unmerited, sovereignly bestowed salvation, Paul’s injunction reflects the numerous biblical warnings about apostasy. Clearly, it is a very serious matter that the strong not behave in such a way as to lead the weaker Christian into sinning against his conscience.”

So then, the issue isn’t in getting a tattoo and having someone be a dick about it. The stumbling being referenced here is in pressuring someone to get a tattoo or drink a brewski or eat bacon (which I’ll never feel bad about) in our actions and words.

The biggest issue, as always, is whether a tattoo would be legitimately for the glory of God. If it is, then go for it. If it’s not, then don’t get it.

And if you have a problem with tattoos, don’t be a douche about it. You have no right. Jesus says so.

Bill Maher completely misses the point in his latest tirade on Christians

Bill Maher recently went on another of his famous rants against Christianity, and he once again had too many red herrings and missed points to count.

See it for yourself (word choice is NSFW).

He somehow equates Christians who are douchebags to their waiters at restaurants to those who don’t think the government should be in charge of charitable work. Once again, as Joffre the Giant puts it, the atheists are playing a completely different, more petty game.

Of course, Maher is known for taking the worst of “Christians” and setting that as the standard for Christian behavior. He’s even been ripped by other atheists for making up claims about Christianity with his documentary, Religulous.

But that all misses the entire point that many Christians, at least those who ascribe to political conservatism, don’t want the government involved in high taxation and charitable work because they just suck at it and we can do better and we’ll actually enjoy doing it.

Honestly, we’ve seen the in the last few weeks what happens when the government tries to do nice things for poor people (Hint: It just screws them harder).

Or we could check out what happened in the 4th century AD when Julian, often called the last Pagan Roman Emperor, realized that the Christians were essentially stealing away the Roman citizenry with their charity.

“These impious Galileans (Christians) not only feed their own, but ours also; welcoming them with their agape, they attract them, as children are attracted with cakes… Whilst the pagan priests neglect the poor, the hated Galileans devote themselves to works of charity, and by a display of false compassion have established and given effect to their pernicious errors. Such practice is common among them, and causes contempt for our gods.”

What Maher doesn’t realize is that whenever Christians do something charitable, it’s to God’s glory and for our joy.

Call us selfish, but that means we want to do it.

Controversial Lutheran pastor is heretical in a way not publicized

Recently, this Nadia Bolz-Weber character has been in the news a lot. She’s a pastor in the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, is covered in tattoos and apparently likes to say words old white guys don’t like.

I have no qualms with this picture.

The latter two things are issues I really don’t care about. As one who is theologically conservative, I do take issue with a woman being a pastor, as pastors/elders/bishops (all the same Greek word) are to be men, as per several Biblical passages. That’s probably where her theology starts crumbling in the first place.

Tom Brock, another Lutheran pastor, says he thumbed through Bolz-Weber’s book recently. Here’s what he first had to say.

I flipped through her new book and she repeatedly uses the “f” word, referring to the 12 disciples as a “bunch of “f” ups”.

As I’ve already established, I really don’t care about that part. But here’s where things get seriously shaky. He quotes from the book.

“And just to be clear: The cross is not about God as divine child abuser sadly sending his little boy off to be killed because we were bad and well, somebody had to pay.”

He then correctly contrasts this with 1 Corinthians 15:3.

“For I delivered to you as of first importance what I also received: that Christ died for our sins in accordance with the Scriptures.”

And for more context, let’s see just how important this is just a few verses later in 1 Corinthians 15:17.

“And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins.”

That’s kind of a big deal.

Of course, the ELCA (note that I don’t have a problem with all Lutherans, but I’ll call out BS when it should be) doesn’t exactly have the most Scripturally-sound track record in the world.

But this is still a big deal.

Like a lot.