How to suck at disagreeing in a discussion

It may strike you as strange, but I’ve actually gotten really good at disagreeing with people. Yes, occasionally requires a fiery, Martin Luther type approach, but I’ve recently had some discussions that resulted in the dissenting party basically smoking from the ears and following all manner of logical flaws.

That said, here’s a guide on how to suck at disagreement just as bad as my recent counterparts.

1) Take things out of context.

These references never get old.

Better yet, take everything out of context. If I say, “I love Nazis dying in movies,” make sure you quote me as saying, “I love Nazis.”

2) Don’t answer questions.

Jay Carney: Master of Avoidance

Just keep going through your talking points. The quicker you ignore any questions that automatically shoot holes in what you’ve already said, the quicker everyone else will forget that you just got intellectually owned.

3) When all else fails, condescension works best.

Exactly.

Insinuate ulterior motives. Start calling names (fag, stupid Christian, pagan, liberal asshole, conservative asshole, retard atheist, religious nutjob and capitalist seem to work best). The main point is to let them know that even if someone has completely destroyed your argument, you’re still better than them.

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Here’s exactly the main problem with "mainline" Christianity

This video is of Tim Christensen. He’s the pastor of Gold Hill Lutheran Church in Butte, Montana. It also turns out that something was more important than him, you know, being a pastor yesterday.

Now, I have no problem with legitimate Lutherans. Sure, I disagree with some things, but ol’ Martin was kind of important in church history. You know, like that whole Protestant Reformation and such.

Reformer, theologian, and expert purveyor of fart jokes.

And Christensen just crapped all over that and what Jesus did to start this whole Christianity thing. He just dipped out on his church to go watch his football game, which happened to infringe on his church service.

But he actually did us all a favor in exposing what mainline liberal Christianity’s real problem. It’s not about Jesus and getting closer to and becoming more like him. It’s self-help, mushy, self-esteem, idolatrous bullshit.

It’s taken out of context, but Luther’s own words can be used here.

“Why would anyone tolerate such things from someone like you, a rotten paunch, crude ass and fart-ass?” – Martin Luther, Against the Roman Papacy

Why should¬†anyone tolerate such things from someone who’s supposed to be a leader at that church? They shouldn’t. But too many do. And that’s why liberal Christian denominations are shrinking by the truckload.

EDIT: Yes, I’m now aware that it’s come out that this was a joke, but the delivery is still poor in that the YouTube video only showed the joke without the proceeding service. It also doesn’t negate my other points.